We will meet again

where the earth meets the stars

and at the rainbows end

This is not goodbye

I will see you beyond the sky

and I know its okay to cry

Each day is very hard

I try to make it through

but its so hard without you

What I wouldnt give for one more try

to start the clock again

and say what needs to be said

but I know we will meet again

In the wee hours do i sit since i cant sleep anyways. I got some cleaning done. But you are always on the back of my mind. The sadness overcomes me till the point of where I feel like I am chocking. The other day Noel and I went to your grave sight and as usual i am sad after but when i got into the car i could smell a man cologne that only lasted for a few moments and then it was gone. I like to think that it was  you saying hello. Noel is doing so well Dad. I know you were concerned about her not reading but now that she is on aderal she is able to focus and she is reading, i know you must be happy about that. She is a beautiful smart and caring child. A mother at church told the pastors wife said how nice Noel was to her disabled child. You know she is just soooo caring and loving that at time I am like how did I get so lucky. I just wanted to let you know the Matt is working so hard and taking very good care of us. I am all better from my mrsa scare. Your birthday is coming soon and I know it going to be hard.

The Night

Latley it has been so hard for me to sleep at night. I have always suffered from insomnia but lately it has been horrible. I sit in the dark and the voices in my head will not stop. I think of my dad and a whirwind of what ifs fill my thoughts till the point of being scared and sad at the same time. Its all I can do at times to get a few hours of broken sleep then get up with Noel to take her to school then I come home and crash. Sleeping during the daytime is easier and I manage to get some sleep but it doesnt feel enough. 

First Day back at school

Today was Noels first day back to school after christmas break well i do think it went well  she was a unhappy camper